Thursday, August 27, 2015

Why Suffer and Shut Up?

No country is perfect. Not even the United States, not United Kingdom, not France and not Holland. That is granted.

Malaysia is...cough...less than perfect.

But the difference is that while everyone suffers in one way or the other, why must Malaysians suffer in silence?

The past generation had limited options hence, had to shut up, suffer and plan an escape route for their children. Away from this godawful unfair country.

But this generation is a little different. We were not personally involved in the May 13 1969 riot. Thankfully, because it must have been dreadful for our parents.

Instead, this generation sees a sliver of hope. Maybe. Perhaps. Could it be.

And that is why despite being threatened again and again, we choose hope.
Why then, must we suffer in silence? If we were to suffer, then allow us to speak up. And for once, you have to learn how to listen. Listen like a good leader should.

Times have changed and so should you. There is no longer a reason for people to suffer in silence and tolerate things that we see are wrong, or plan an escape route.

Even the kids who have 'escaped' this racist country came back to reclaim their rights in Malaysia. Does that say something to you? Guess not. Because you never had to deal with dissent. Our parents never gave Malaysia a reason to.

It is time to be a good leader and let those who are suffering speak up, not shut up like what we have been doing.

We see hope, Mr. NAJIB. Don't snuffle out even this glimmer of hope for us and please do the right thing.

Thank you.

Sincerely,
Marsha

Friday, August 21, 2015

Moms - Predictor of the Food-ture

Plan everything...EVERYTHING....to a point that you have to know exactly when everything should fall into place.

In the past two weeks, I have mastered the art of working and cooking at the same time. No, I do not write in the kitchen and no, I don't have a fired-up rice cooker sitting next to my laptop. But hey, that's a nice idea, eh?

There's been some complaints about the food at the cafeteria which resulted in my attempt (a quite successful one so far) to produce enough food in a day for both lunch and dinner. And man, THAT takes a whole lot of planning, I can tell ya that!

I have to give a few high-fives to cook books, the internet, other moms on a similar quests to cook home-made meals for their family members, earnest shares from other moms/dads on Facebook groups, my phone (for the list....that LIST of things to make and ingredients to get, it's all there), my slow cooker, oven, air fryer, rice steamer....ok, you get it. 

The whole idea is to either:-
1. Cook in batches
2. Freeze
3. Use a Timer
4. Slow cook almost everything
5. Recycle food intelligently
6. Get the kids to help
7. Cheat a little...it's OK once in a while and nobody has to know that you can find some form of version of it on aisle number 7 in TESCO and you just modified it a little.....like ketchup.

With these 7 little ideas, I got it going for two weeks and I can't say it has been a breeze because it most certainly was not. But I think the key is planning ahead and always check the fridge if there is something you can use or play around with. 

So far, that's the... 
  • mushroom sauce with spaghetti
  • fried rice
  • two massive sandwich with bacon, cheese, ham, egg and home-made chicken patties
  • lasagna
  • spaghetti
  • beef, bacon and sausage pie
  • uninspiring noodles
  • Chinese sausage (cheater spotted), red beans and some steamed vegetables
  • takeaway food from restaurants (another cheat spotted)
  • Scrambled eggs with tomatoes with rice and luncheon meat (hehe...)
The journey continues. Anyway, it's Friday again, have a splendid weekend, people of the world!


XOXO,
Marsha

Friday, July 17, 2015

Selamat Hari Raya to Everyone who is Celebrating

Hari Raya is a Muslim celebration where family and friends come together to start afresh. It is sort of a reboot for some, to forgive and forget and be understanding because....we are all human and humans make mistakes. Unless you are a Humanicorn. Then proceed.

There's one thing I think I want to highlight, though. The ability to forgive yourself too. Sometimes, we tend to be our biggest judge, even when others have forgiven ourselves, we tend to hold onto a little bit of that anger, that judgement inside of ourselves. Sometimes, we punish ourselves incessantly too. And when we do, it can be the most EVIL thing that we can think of. Things you wouldn't do to babies, strangers, puppies and your enemies.

But you would do it to yourself.

So, here's a short reminder.


Monday, June 29, 2015

Music: Try - Colbie Caillat

One of the most inspiring and touching songs released in this era of auto-tuned songs, raunchy lyrics and superficial and sexist (er....anaconda, no? lol) videos. Whenever I listen to the lyrics, tears well up because it is so refreshing for us to break out of the reins that society have placed around our necks.

Freeing yourself from what people impose on you is one of the most liberating things. IMHO la but it is really up to you if you want to use makeup, if it makes you feel good about yourself (or when you have to attend a wedding la...can't imagine going bare-faced myself haha) but the key is 'choice'.

If you feel strangled by the norm, don't be afraid to break free. Otherwise, go on doing what makes you happy.



Put your make up on
Get your nails done
Curl your hair
Run the extra mile
Keep it slim
So they like you. Do they like you?

Get your sexy on
Don't be shy, girl
Take it off
This is what you want, to belong
So they like you. Do you like you?

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try
Yoooou don't have to try

Ooooo, oooooo, oooooo...

Get your shopping on,
At the mall,
Max your credit cards
You don't have to choose,
Buy it all
So they like you. Do they like you?

Wait a second,
Why should you care, what they think of you
When you're all alone, by yourself
Do you like you? Do you like you?

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to bend until you break
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try

You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try
Yoooou don't have to try

Oooooo
Oooooo

You don't have to try so hard
You don't have to give it all away
You just have to get up, get up, get up, get up
You don't have to change a single thing

You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try, try, try, try-i-i
You don't have to try
You don't have to try

Take your make up off
Let your hair down
Take a breath
Look into the mirror, at yourself
Don't you like you?
Cause I like you

Love,
XOXO,
Marsha

Monday, June 22, 2015

First, See Me for Who I am

I saw this post by Timber Hawkeye on Facebook and decided...what the hell...might as well post it. I was called 'hippie' by two of my closest friends recently and I was kinda intrigued with WHY I was labeled as such that I actually Googled it up.


Presumably because I don't do things the conventional way, I hug trees, love world peace, make my own soap, recycle and dress whatever way I want and I don't believe in heels nor manicures. I will wait for them to correct me on this, lol.

As mentioned by Buddhist Boot Camp, he went to gym all the time and started attracting people who loved his physique, his car and his fashion sense. But it is not the fault of those who were attracted to him, and yet he was upset that that was all they saw in him.

I used to do the same too but mainly because I was a singer. My job was to look good and entertain.


I don't know why I have this picture on my side table but yes, that's how short a skirt can get before you start showing your underwear. lol

If you have ever been in the entertainment industry, you will get this (with a wry laugh)  - when you are dressed like that, especially if you are a woman, you are inviting trouble. I don't mean to say the same about rape and other stuff but 'trouble' as in....stares, looks, invitation to grope mostly. And yes, I have been groped so many times, especially when men get tipsy, that I have lost count. It came to a point when I started asking myself why it didn't bother me as much anymore. Why did the guys laugh it off when they were groped too...yes, men. Being groped?

We are entertainers...and this is...gasp....expected. You get money stuffed down your bra and you are required to shimmy when the 'clients' ask you to, do the Shakira or whatever.

Over time, people don't see you as a singer any more, just someone who is donning that bloody short skirt and skimpy outfit on stage....who is singing something that is NOT off-tune. lol

I am not saying that I hate singing or the stage. I will always love the stage and singing. I am saying that I have taken my integrity back.

So, my friends can call me anything they want (no offense taken, really - in fact, I think I like the hippie label) but as long as I dress and behave the way I want to, I will attract the right people. If all they see is a skimpy skirt or a man's buff body, that is going to attract people who are attracted to that.

And I am done with assholes. Simply because assholes are attracted to skimpy clothes. I am not saying ALL men are assholes but a large number of assholes think improper thoughts when they look at women in such short skirts...and they can and they do. Reality check. =)

What I want to attract are nice people, humble people, kind people, people who treat others properly and with good manners and I shall dress in t-shirt and jeans until I find someone worth wearing a short skirt for. As and when it makes me feel good.

And if I decide to 'flaunt what I've got', it is because I have decided to do just that.

See me first, for the person that I am, and then I will show you another side of me that you will appreciate, not the other way around.

Love,
Marsha

Friday, June 19, 2015

When You Get Too Attached to your Phone

Note 3, my dear phone, why are you dying on me? I love you so much and you are such a perfect phone for me. I mean it! I dont even want to replace you at all! 😯

Till this day, you are still the best ever, ever, ever, EVER.

The size is amazing. Camera is awesome. Screen is right up there with the best and the best instagram pics were with you. YOU. Do you remember all those fond memories? It's in the memory thing, look it up.

Was it because I bought another phone/tab thing?

Damn, I bought it so that your battery won't run out so quickly when I spend 7 hours on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, Pinterest, Tumblr, Reddit!

It was never meant to REPLACE you, my darling phone. It was your personal assistant, damn it. Do you hear me? It was your body double....just a larger screen, yes, but it doesn't perform like you do, I swear!

I love you Note 3, please come back. No, I don't want Note 4! I want Note 3.

Please don't go wonky on me again. Please. Come back.....

Love,
Your owner,
Marsha

P.s. for LOL purposes only in case some people think this is for real

Thursday, June 18, 2015

SLIP - Awesome Dance Choreography


The past, it's true. It's comfortable. It's comforting. It's what we think is safe. 
Everyone will tell you it is hard to let go of pain... and it is. Since we are children we have been told to embrace the best of our experiences & disregard the worst... But what happens when the most beautiful memories from our past end up doing the most damage to our future?
This dance is awesome, I mean, the dancers were great but I have to give them my maximum number of thumbs up and toes up for the concept of 'letting go' shown through this creative dance.



Click on this link if you can't watch it on your phone or tab.

It's Thursday, people of the world,
Smile,
XOXO,
Marsha

Thursday, June 4, 2015

Parenting On The Internet Is Wrong

When news about a 13-year-old teenager posting pictures of herself in provocative clothes and pictures on Facebook and befriending people, especially men, on the social networking site surfaced, I was a little happy that her mother appeared to have reacted very appropriately, with disappointment and anger.

She SHOULD be totally upset about it too. Does she know the type of danger and people she is exposing herself to? On the internet?

What isn't appropriate, to me, is her method of dealing with it.

Remember the father who was angry with his daughter's usage of the internet and blew up her laptop very publicly? I believe the video went viral at the time it was posted. And then there was this other video of a dad who was unhappy with his son's lack of drive to find a 'proper' job and so, he brought all his video games out onto the lawn and well....drove a lawn mower all over the video games with the son crying and pleading with his father to stop.

By the same token, this mother's video, too, went viral.

I disagree with this method of punishment based on the fact that this is public shaming of the most humiliating kind. The cruelest too.

Should we subject our children, who look to us as parents, protectors, leaders, cheerleaders, examples and a source of comfort , assurance and guidance, to such a humiliation? Have we exhausted all other available methods?

Would it be alright if we had a parenting meltdown and our children kept the cameras rolling and posted it on social media sites? Would it be alright if lovers had a spat and kept the cameras rolling and then posted it on Youtube for the public to see? Would it be alright if bestfriends fell out with each other but had private conversations recorded and posted it on Youtube?

If ANY one of the above is NOT alright, why would it be alright for parents to use public punishment via the internet?

These parents need to remember one thing....with the internet, it is going to stay there forever. You may take the picture or the video down after a few days, once it goes viral, it is out of control. Someone would have recorded it, downloaded it, screencapped it and distributed it.

If we love our children, why would we want them to live with their image or video, reputation and livelihood to be remembered by everyone in the world for such a humiliating incident? If we love our children, we should stop and think....they are going to live with this for the rest of their lives.

For me, this Denver-mom was going on an ego trip as well as 'trying to do the right thing'. She wants, first and foremost, that everything she says goes. She also wants everyone to know that she is a single parent and her ex husband is a loser. She also mentioned that HER pride and HER family's pride has been hurt by this teenager's actions. Why would she want everyone to know that her daughter doesn't even know how to 'wipe her own butt properly'? How is that relevant?

To me, it appears that she wants to muscle her daughter into submission instead of showing her that posting half-naked photos of herself on social media and 'making friends' with these strangers online is NOT OK.

We need to also remember, our children are human beings. They make mistakes and our job is to be angry about it and help correct it. There are many ways to punish children.

For example, if they love the internet so much, there would be a bigger impact if you removed their access to it. If they love games, take away their laptops or Nintendos or whatever access to game consoles. If they love going out with their friends, ground them.

And then talk to them.

That's our job.

We are not perfect as parents and if someone kept the cameras rolling while I do my thing as a parent, you will see plenty of humiliating mistakes that I make as a parent all over the Youtube. The moments when I scream and get angry for something, the moment I was too drunk, the moments when I said the wrong things, the moments when I jumped to conclusions, the moments I overcooked the chicken, moments when I woke up late for school, moments when I blamed my kids for something they did not do or mean.

If my kids kept the cameras rolling and uploaded it onto Youtube, how am I supposed to continue living my life as a parent without having a huge part of my confidence and pride of bring a loving parent get chipped off?

So, if we love our children, we should understand and have some compassion and talk them out of doing the wrong thing. Not upload their mistakes onto Youtube for everyone to see and have it follow them around for the rest of their lives.

Imagine 8 years down the road.....

'Oh, you were the kid who had naked selfies and your mom called you out for it, huh?'

'Oh, so, you're the one, huh? Your father shot your laptop to death. HHAHAHA'

'You want to be hired? But there was this video of you of your father saying that you were too lazy to get a job and loved to play games. So, nah, you can go back to your video games. We are looking for hardworking people'.

Imagine that.

Love,
Marsha

Note/Update: I recently read another news about a 13-year-old girl committing suicide after her dad shamed her on Youtube. Is that really what we want?

Image source: Jody and Kayla

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Nadia Kamil's Feminist Burlesque

LOL. I don't know about you but if you have a few minutes to spare before ending your Tuesday, watch this feminist burlesque 'choreography'.

I have not heard of Nadia Kamil before but....well, now I have. =)

Sunday, May 17, 2015

Take a Look At My Name

Have a good look at my name and it might tell you a little bit about why the recent Rohingya refugee situation might hurt me a little. If any of those people on the boats were one of my ancestors, I might not be here today. Turned away, shunned and deemed society's trash and burden.

Yes, many of Malaysia's citizens are from other countries. We were from China, we were from India and we were from Indonesia....and many other countries lah, for that matter. But what this writer had right was that, my ancestors were NOT from any of the abovementioned countries.

People from Indonesia, China and India had a status...or second-class status, depending on where you came from. My ancestors came from this 'trash' country. We were relegated to just 'others'. I have long complained about this 'status' given to me because when I was a child, I thought I was balardie Chinese. I desperately wanted to be Chinese, I mean, I speak Hokkien and Hokkien is kinda Chinese, right? No? Don't quality?

Fine. We live like this then. Others. It is a form of acceptance.

While it is true that Malaysia had long 'tolerated' this influx of 'trash' people like my ancestors and me, would it be different if we had blonde hair and blue eyes? Many of these 'trash' people make something of themselves here, robbing our own citizens of jobs that we won't take anyway.

McDonalds, KFC, Ah Kow Restaurant, your favorite Char Kuey Teow stall, beef noodle food truck, floor sweeper, toilet cleaners, grass cutters, gutter cleaners, security guards, whatever....these jobs, would we take it, anyway? No, we are too educated for that and we would rather pay them nonsense to do it for us.

These 'trash' people. So desperate.

They should go to school, learn English and Maths and Geography or whatever and make something of themselves. Oh, wait. My ancestors were given the chance HERE in Malaysia.

But, whatever lah, they should make something of themselves. On the boats or whatever. These 'trash' people should just do something on their own and not bother other countries. Like we do not have to deal with GST or nonsense companies making ridiculous purchases and Pandas from China or something. We got problems, OK?

Take a look at my name. If any of my ancestors were on those boats today, I would not be here writing this stupid post.

Image Source: Internet

Rant, over.

I pray for mercy, medical aid and urgent refuge for these people,
From the bottom of my heart,
XOXO,
Marsha